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Welcome to MM!
No matter how you got here, we hope you'll find us
diverse, caring, flexible, and non-judgmental. We're
also funny, smart and most of us don't like to be told what to do. Some of
us have been here for years, but many people join weekly so there are always lots of newer folks here too. We are a group of
equals, so the minute you "stepped through the door" of MM you became
just as valued and important as everyone else.
At any time of the day or night, 365 days a year, you and all MM members can
send emails ("posts") that can be read by every other MM'er ("posting to the list"). The MM community
is a place to share our experiences and thoughts, to give each other encouragement
and support, and sometimes just to be around other people who understand what it's like to face the real-world challenges of managing our
drinking.
You will soon be receiving an information letter detailing some of the more common
questions (such as how to post to the list, tips on managing your email, some
suggested "next steps", etc.). You're
encouraged to read through it to get the most you can out of your MM
experience, and hopefully, as so many others have already discovered, you will
find this to be a uniquely helpful and one-of-a-kind place.
Belonging to MM is all about making good choices. We're
glad you've chosen to join us!
The MM Welcome Message Team (Ana, David, Goldie, John, Kurt)
Hi, and again welcome to MM!
Please save (and/or print) this message, as it contains some important and
useful information, including:
** How the MM email list (listserv) works
** Managing your email
** Valuable Resources on the Web Site
** More ways to meet up with other MM'ers (Face to Face & Online Chat)
** Next steps ABS: Abstaining from alcohol ABS LIST and ROAD TOUR-a monthly list of “absers” updated daily and
maintained by Sarah. This involves a virtual tour or adventure. ABSTAR: The MM daily drink-counting website (http://www.moderation.org/abstar/). Your account can be public (everyone can see it)
or private. ANTABUSE (DISULFRAM)—a drug taken to support abstinence (if you’ve
taken it you get sick when you drink) BAC: Blood alcohol concentration (http://www.moderation.org/bac/index.shtml). A measure of the amount of un-metabolized alcohol
in the blood (how drunk you are). Depends on gender, age, weight, and number
of drinks over time. BABY STEPS. Approaching change in small steps (example: start measuring
and counting drinks). BTB/MOP/ABS ROSTER—A daily updated list of members’ drinking goals. BTB--By The Book
moderation), refers to the book RESPONSIBLE DRINKING and means drinking no
more than 3 drinks a day and 9 a week for women, or 4 a day and 14 a week for
men, with at least 3 or 4 non-drinking days a week. CAMPRAL (ACAMPROSATE) A drug that inhibits alcohol cravings for some. CBC—Cognitive Behavioral Change. Much of the MM program
involves Cognitive Behavioral Change. CHAT The MM chatroom (http://www.moderation.org/chat/) CRAZINGS: Strong urges or cravings for alcohol CRINGE MOMENT; Some particularly embarrassing or harmful event
related to drinking. DH: Dear husband DW: Dear Wife ETOH, (abbreviation for
ETHYL ALCOHOL) consumable alcohol. F2F –Face-to-face, as in a F2F MM meeting. HARM REDUCTION (HR): The philosophy underlying Moderation Management:
behavior change need not be all or nothing. Any reduction of the harm
associated with drinking is positive. Change may be approached in small
steps. Each individual chooses his/her own goal. IMHO / IMO --In My Humble Opinion / In My Opinion LIMO RIDE—a list of drinking commitments for the week. Like
the Abs List and Tour, this involves an imaginary sightseeing journey. MODS: Moderation, drinking moderately MOP--My Own Plan--individual whatever-works-for-me plan. NA BEV. Non-alcoholic beverage. NALTREXONE: (trade name Revia) A medication which inhibits
alcohol cravings. Used to support abstinence or moderation. NEWBIE New to MM. After a few posts to the list, this
condition will no longer apply OLDIE OR OLDBIE --someone who has been with MM for a while PIZZA PARTY—A group fund-raising where everyone sends the price
of a large pizza to MM. PUI: Posting Under the Influence. Not recommended (“don’t
log on with a load on.”) RD RESPONSIBLE DRINKING. by Rotgers, Kern, & Hoelltzl.
(http://www.moderation.org/books.shtml
) Very user-friendly, it
details real-life experiences of MM members. SO: Significant Other SSRI: Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitor (a class of
anti-depressants) STAGES OF CHANGE. Theory that change occurs in stages, detailed in
the book CHANGING FOR GOOD
by
Prochaska, Norcross, and DiClemente
The stages are
conceptualized as: STICKY—A daily roster of everyone who’s not drinking. This
is a sticky note on Charlotte’s refrigerator. TBD: To Be Determined, as in 10/TBD (10 days abstinence of
a period yet to be determined). “A THIRTY” A 30 consecutive day period in which the member
completely abstains from alcohol TOOL BOX—The individual collection of moderation techniques
that each person acquires (examples: planning, using non-alcoholic beverages,
learning to deal with triggers). TRIGGER—A situation, emotion, person, or place which triggers
the urge to drink. URGE SURFING Riding out drink cravings. WNE: “Weird Nervous Energy”. Energy frequently experienced
around the 6th day of alcohol abstinence and lasting as long as the
20th day WTF What the Fudge. WTF MOMENT—“Oh, the heck with
it.” All good intentions fly out the window. YMMV: “Your Mileage May Vary”—results may be individual. #//#: A numerical representation of one’s progress in an Abs
or BTB plan where the first number represent the amount of days completed and
the second number represents the intended length of the plan in days.
Example: 10/30 means 10 days of a planned 30-day abstinence period has been
completed.
** HOW THE MM EMAIL LIST (LISTSERV) WORKS:
* SENDING EMAIL TO THE LIST
To create a NEW email that will go to the whole
list... - Click on [Compose] or [New] (depending on your particular email). -
Type mmlist@listserv.icors.org
in the "To" box. - Type something in
the "Subject" box. - Compose your email. - Click [Send]
sTo send a REPLY to a post that will go to the whole list... - Click on [Reply
all] or [Reply all]. Hitting [Reply] will not send your message to the
entire list, just to the individual. - Click into the "To" box and
delete any addresses except mmlist@listserv.icors.org
. - Add your reply
(usually to the top of the original email). Include only the post, or the part of
it, that you're responding to, in your reply. That
makes it easier to read and our listserv has a size limit to each message. -
Click [Send]
Listserv Problems? Email your questions to: admin@moderation.org
POSTING TIPS
- AN INTRODUCTION: After you've signed up, say hi and tell us a bit about
yourself. Or just hang out and “listen” for a
while. Whenever you feel comfortable, we welcome your participation on
the list.
- POSTING LIMITS: No one post can be over 20K in size (which also means no
attachments), and MM limits the total number of posts from each member to no
more than 18 posts in any one day.
- WHAT ABOUT MISTAKES? Don't
be the least bit concerned about making mistakes in spelling or grammar or
composition. This isn't a contest and nobody is
grading you!
- OFF-TOPIC POSTS: Almost any topic is OK to discuss, but if it clearly
has NOTHING to do with drinking (like sharing a good joke or Aunt Mildred's pie
recipe) then please put "OT" in the subject line.
- POSTING ETIQUETTE. Be honest, but be respectful.
It's OK to be direct - we're all adults here - but
it's NOT OK to attack or belittle another MM member. It's
good to avoid things that we all know could easily lead to controversy (such as
conversations about politics or religion). Profanity is discouraged--be
creative or use asterisks.
SOLICITATIONS: Misuse of the MM email list is rare. However, if you
receive any emails addressed only to you that are asking for money, enticing
you to join other non-MM groups, or any other inappropriate solicitations,
please report it to admin@moderation.org
.
COMMON TERMS USED:
There are many others, you'll catch on. Just ask if you need somebody to
clarify.
MANAGING YOUR EMAIL:
* Will my posts show up somewhere else?
We periodically survey searches on Google to check that list messages are not
being copied anywhere outside our systems. We also check other services. (Yahoo, MSN, etc.) To date, we have found NO evidence that
any Listserv messages or archives are being indexed by any
search engine. In other words, list messages are not “google-able.”
* Will my Name be posted with my message?
The answer to this depends on the name you are sending with your Email address
when you send mail. When you send Email to ANYONE, your Email system can be configured to include a Sender's Name field. Often
this contains your name. We don't care if this name is
a a "list name" or your "real
name"; this choice is up to you.
TIP: You can see what the email address
contains that another person will receive by the simple trick of sending an
Email message to yourself.
The listserv sees and posts the SAME
information that anyone else would see when an Email is
received. So if you are posting and your name
is in the Email message, this name will ALSO APPEAR in the posted message to
the list. To change the name in the message you are posting to the listserv,
just change the name that is used as the "Sender's Name" in your
Email system. (And test by sending yourself mail.)
* What about the Name I chose with my Listserv Subscription?
The name in your Listserv subscription is used in only
a few cases, and normally is never seen. This is NOT the name that is used when you post messages to the list; this name comes
from your Email system. (See above.) The name in your subscription is seen by
Listserv Admins, and will be included if you post
using the online form that is available in the Listserv software if you have
created an ICORS.ORG login. (Almost no-one uses this
system.) Names in subscriptions are completely optional, and we don't ask for your "real
name."
Also note that
the Listserv subscriber list is not published, even to subscribers to the
Listserv. So the only way a fellow Listserv subscriber
will know you are subscribed is if you post to the Listserv itself.
* Protecting your privacy with an anonymous email account:
Many users have found using free email accounts from Google's Gmail, Yahoo mail, or Hotmail helps protect privacy. These
accounts can be set to send mail with any name you choose; subscribers need not
use their "real names" when posting to the Listserv. If you
originally signed up with a name or address you'd prefer to keep private, just
go to http://www.moderation.org/onlinegroups.shtml, and 1) un-subscribe your
private address and 2) subscribe again with
your new address.
*Choosing how MM email comes to you...
See the Online Groups page for the Listserv Management Form (VERY SIMPLE), and
a collection of user guides and other materials:
http://www.moderation.org/onlinegroups.shtml
You may receive your MM email in either REGULAR
or DIGEST options. With the REGULAR option, you'll
receive individual posts as soon as they're sent. This is what most people use
and is the best option if you want to dive right in. If you choose
the DIGEST option you'll receive one long email
containing about 25 messages either once a day or a few times each day
(depending on list volume).
* You want no more MM list email?
On the http://www.moderation.org/onlinegroups.shtml
page you can choose to temporarily go "No Mail" while you're on
vacation or just want to stop receiving MM email f or a while. You can
change your subscription back to REGULAR or
DIGEST delivery whenever you want to begin receiving MM email again.
To unsubscribe and leave MM:
Go to this link: http://www.moderation.org/onlinegroups.shtml, enter your
email address under "To un-subscribe:"
Then click on [UNSUBSCRIBE - Leave the MM Listserv].
You will need to respond to an email confirmation to complete the unsubscription.
* “SUB-LISTS”
For a listing of lower volume, special interest MM groups go to
http://www.moderation.org/relatedgroups.shtml
VALUABLE RESOURCES ON THE MM WEBSITE (and some links that aren't):
* The FAQ page is highly recommended. It is packed full of advice and
experiences of successful MM'ers. Go to:
http://moderation.org/MM_FAQ.htm
* The "Recommended Reading" page has lots of book listings and links
and ordering information. ( If you order a book or
anything else through the Amazon or Barnes & Noble links on this page, MM
will get a small percentage of the price.) The books page is here:
http://moderation.org/books.html
* OTHER GREAT STUFF
For a DRINKING DEPENDENCE QUESTIONNAIRE:
http://moderation.org/Questionnaire.htm
For a WORKSHEET to record daily drinks and other changes:
http://moderation.org/wdb.shtml
Want to find a THERAPIST who'll support
moderate drinking?:
http://www.moderation.org/therapist_finder.shtml
* MM ABSTAR:
This is a tool many of us use to track our daily intake and ABS (abstaining)
days.
You can have a private or a public record It
is located at:
http://www.moderation.org/abstar/
* Want to see what we look like?
http://www.kodakgallery.com/Welcome.jsp
The "Member sign-in" Email Address is: mmphotopage@yahoo.com
- The
password is: moderation
*Need to contact Moderation Management with any other questions?
Use our online form: http://www.moderation.org/contact_mm.shtml?mm,
Or email to :
mm@moderation.org
MORE WAYS TO MEET UP WITH OTHER MM'ERS (Face to Face & Online Chat)
* FACE TO FACE GROUPS: To find out if there's an MM meeting near
you go to this link:
http://moderation.org/natlf2f.html
* CHAT: You can chat on-line in "real time" with other
MM members. There are regularly scheduled chats, both "formal
on-line meetings" and "social" chats. Plus,
the chat room is open 24 hours a day, so feel free to check into chat any time
you want and chat with anyone else who might be there.
To go into chat and/or find schedules, go to this link:
http://www.moderation.org/chat/
- Caution: The MM chat is open to the public, so it's
a good idea to limit any personal information that you share. Please be
cautious of anyone trying to solicit money from you and/or entice you to join
other groups or chats that are not affiliated with
MM. If it's not on the chat link above, it's not
a MM chat room.
ONLY groups that are listed at
http://www.moderation.org/relatedgroups.shtml are affiliated with MM.
- If you have questions or problems using chat, or feel anyone is abusing chat,
please email to: chat@moderation.org
** NEXT STEPS
A common question is "what should I do first or next?" There
are no "shoulds" here. There's no right or wrong way. You're
on a journey, and the only one who can decide where you're headed and how you
might best get there is YOU! But here are some great suggestions:
- You've already signed up to this list, so you've already done the first best
thing for yourself!
- Just thinking about change is a good starting place.
- Gather information. Make small changes; "baby steps."
- Changing your drinking habits doesn't happen all at
once.
- Hang out on the list and read, write and absorb.
- Post to the list.
- Focus your motivation to change. Write it down.
- Get *Responsible Drinking* (order online:
http://moderation.org/books.html)
- Start recording your daily/weekly drinking.
- If you're a daily drinker, start putting a
no-drinking day into your week.
- Start cutting down the number of drinks in any one day,
even if just a little.
If you have questions about how MM works, or how others have handled certain
drinking issues, or pretty much ANY question or comment about almost anything
you can think of, POST IT TO THE LIST. You may be surprised to find out
that there are many others who have gone through, and are STILL dealing with,
situations very much the same as your own.
This isn't just "the" MMs list, this is
*YOUR* MM list... Welcome!
From the MM Welcome Message Team (John & Goldie & David & Ana &
Kurt)
using our contact form and the link below:
admin@moderation.org