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Frequently Asked Questions      

Introduction and Contents      

Questions about MM? Find answers in the experiences of its members!

The information here is typical of conversations within the online groups. These are not expert opinions as much as collected wisdom.

It’s not unusual for our perspectives to vary -- what works for one of us often doesn’t work for all of us. Discussing our questions, challenges, fears, and successes, though, we learn about our options and grab hold of ideas for moving forward.

Please let us know what questions we have missed, or what experiences could be added!

(All material here is believed to be posted with authors’ consent. Please Contact the Webmaster, mm@moderation.org with concerns about misused material.)
 
Is MM right for me? Not identifying as alcoholic? • Like getting buzzed? • Ambivalence a problem? • Doubtful? • Confident? • Need AA? • In denial? • Hit bottom first? • Harm reduction? • Not a severe problem? • Can’t stop? • Not ready? • Disagree? • Not online much?
How do I get started? Where to start? • Why chart? • How to chart? • 30 days is too long? • Do a 30 right away? • What if I fail? • What if I still need AA?
Email Listserv?
The MM Main List
MM Main List Listserv Subscription Form • MM Listserv Welcome Letter • General Listserv Help Information
I’m on my way, but... Want 6 or 8 instead of 3 or 4? • Family pressures? • Not drinking makes me want to drink? • Abstaining feels edgy? • Time to punish myself? • Frustrated with failure? • Freshman euphoria? • Deprived when not drinking? • Do a 30 and be done? • How long does it take? • Hit a plateau? • Moderation, a result? • Feeling artificial? • Obsess forever? • Backsliding?
Tips during a 30 Humbled on day 15 • Just for now • Muscle-building • Signs of health • Planning for the 30 • Trading habits • Do steps 3-6 • Interact with the group • Reward yourself • One day or hour at a time • Visualization • Importance of food • Facing setbacks • "Thoughts from the Crew"
No Thanks!
(why I’m not drinking)
Medication • Pregnancy • Lunar phase • Designated driver • Liver on vacation • Losing weight • Marathon training
Drinking Moderately (lessons after a 30) Defusing a trigger • What am I saying "no" to? • Activities, rules, imperfections and goals • One beer! • Personal inventory after a 30 • I choose clarity! • After my second 30
Questions for therapists Questions to ask when looking for an MM-friendly therapist
Coping with urges Urges are normal • Decatastrophize • Dispute Expectancies • Distract • Keep testing to figure out what works
Words of wisdom Choice • Self-acceptance • Social situations • Self-control • Think-Anon • Relationships • Doing it for ourselves • Cravings • Independence • Awareness, Acceptance and Action • Practicing moderation • How did you know it was a problem?
Success! What do we want most? • Saying "yes" to something and "no" to something else • Stronger than we think • Mourning my desire for excessive drinking • Intellectual vs. visceral desire • Stopping vs wanting to stop • It takes more than a 30 • I’m on a new quest • Change is a process, not an event • Charting helps
What is alcoholism? Family Practice Notebook • Diagnostic criteria • DSM • ICD • Moving toward agreement • A commentary
Dr. Deluca’s site A wealth of information here!
Random thoughts Drinking alone • Giving in to the voice • Taped myself blotto and watched it later • Rhetorical questions • What do I enjoy? • Being sober feels normal • Not feeling deprived • Evaluate the plan monthly • Negative thoughts & positive affirmations
How I got here Stories by "T" (female) and "X" (male)
Alcohol alternatives Mixed drinks, NA beers
Gems Benefits of moderating • Alternative activities • Why I’m not drinking or having "just one more" • Alcohol and heredity • The voice • Geese • Bottom gun • Drinking quotes
Anger Anger is • Anger is not • Tips for management • Story: The Fence • More tips • Drinking to quell anger • Anger and violence
Doing a 30 Day 19 feedback • 30 as a frame of reference, a starting point • Creating visceral desire for moderation
One person’s
survival hints
Working at home • Happy hour • If you cannot get through a 30 • Restaurants • Parties and gatherings • Home alone
Quotes Doing instead of being "done to" • Dream it, begin it • Serenity • The weak and the strong • Strength from doing small things • Ambition without knowledge • Measuring success • Having new eyes • Reflection, immitation, and experience • Persistence • Live out loud • Obstacles • Destiny • Failure, enthusiasm and power
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